Myth:

Reality: The coordinator can only control so much. If you have hired merchants who are new to the wedding scene or you have chosen a less than desirable location, your coordinator will do what she can to make your dreams a reality, but she can’t control the behavior of unskilled merchants, the leaking roof, the overflowing toilets and other issues.

Whether you are hiring a coordinator to help with all the planning or just for the day, she should be available to advise you throughout the planning process. Though a day-of coordinator won’t visit merchants with you, she should give you advice on questions to ask and what to look for so you make informed decisions. She should offer referrals to dependable merchants who have a reputation for providing quality service at an affordable price and who are willing to work with you and your budget.

You need to meet with your day-of coordinator several times before the wedding, often enough to develop a relationship. You should feel comfortable with her and she should understand your personality and tastes. That way, any decisions she needs to make will be ones you would have made.

Your day-of coordinator should help you create a timeline for the rehearsal and wedding day and she should be at the rehearsal to supervise activities in cooperation with your officiant. If your officiant doesn’t attend rehearsals (and many don’t), she should be prepared to conduct the rehearsal.

Hiring a day-of wedding coordinator is one of the best decisions you can make to assure your wedding day is as flawless as possible, but don’t wait until the last minute to hire her. Do it while she is available, then trust her to handle the details so you, and your mom, can enjoy your big day.

Interested in seeing more Wedding Coordinator myths revealed? Check out our previous post!

Submitted by:

Glenna Tooman, Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC
www.memorable-events.com

©2011, Glenna Tooman, all rights reserved

Can Mom do it? No, she will be in the photos and you want her to enjoy the day. Can Aunt Martha do it? Maybe, but will she want to miss the festivities to spend her time rushing around in the background? So, your best option is to hire a day-of wedding coordinator. Right? Maybe.

Myth: A day-of coordinator can be hired shortly before the wedding, after all the details are in place.

Reality: If you wait, you may not be able to find a knowledgeable and experienced coordinator. (Beware the person who is hoping you will be her first client.) Coordinators book months, sometimes a year or more, in advance. They book day-of events just like they book events at which they are assisting with the planning. If her calendar is full, you are out of luck.

Myth: A day-of coordinator will take your plans and make them happen.

Reality: In most cases, unless you have planned numerous events in the past, the coordinator will need to tweak your plans to fit the realities of your location, weather, time of day and other considerations. For instance, if you are planning an outdoor wedding, those tall, skinny centerpieces may look pretty, but they won’t remain standing long. The slightest breeze and they will topple, leaving your linens soaking wet and the centerpieces unusable. Or, you plan to use paper plates at a windy location. If you do, your guests may end up wearing their dinner rather than enjoying it. Or how about those bees or the fruit flies at the winery that love to crawl around on your food? Ick! A knowledgeable coordinator will know about these issues and many others and will recommend solutions.

… more Wedding Coordinator myths in two weeks, check back soon!

Submitted by:

Glenna Tooman, Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC
www.memorable-events.com

©2011, Glenna Tooman, all rights reserved

Idaho Outdoor Weddings

Are you an Idaho bride planning your wedding  for this year or next? Moving your wedding celebration outdoors is definitely a trend that is continuing through 2010. When moving your wedding outdoors, there are still a number of ways you can go.

Outdoor – Upscale:

Enhance the beauty that mother nature provides in your location by utilizing rentals. Rent chairs and tables, tents and a dance floor. Add decorations that tie in with the outdoor beauty such as lights, crystal and other decorative elements traditionally used indoors. Make sure that you rent tents to provide areas of shade and protection from any light breezes or possible rain. Hire a wedding decorator or coordinator or talk with rental companies to find unique ideas that will help to elevate the natural beauty of the location you choose.

Outdoor – Casual:

Go simple. One of the advantages of living in Idaho is we have such a wide variety of possibilities for outdoor wedding locations. Consider a casual “summer dress” style wedding. Have your bridesmaids choose their own dresses off the rack but matching your colors. Consider asking your guests to dress casual for a wedding in the park. If your family and friends are the outdoors type anyway – you might want to even have games lined up such as croquet, horseshoes, frisbee, etc. – and consider renting a bounce house or other entertainment for kids. You could even do a shoes optional theme and hand out custom designed flip flops or flower anklets. Be creative and use mother nature as your inspiration!

When having your wedding outdoors in Idaho you have many choices and sources of inspiration. Take advantage and think outside the box to help make your wedding day unique and a perfect reflection of you!

Going bold with your wedding colors

Selecting your wedding style and colors will be some of your first items to do, helping to set the décor decisions you will make from here forward. Not all brides want traditional wedding colors like white with pale pink or navy blue with silver accents. When you are looking for ways to incorporate the “wow” factor into your wedding, think about using colors with more intensity and boldness. One of the most intense color combinations is purple and red for a wedding with pizzazz.

Purple and red make a strong statement together; they work well for bridesmaids dresses, selecting one of the colors as the focal point and accenting the other. For example: Deep Eggplant Purple could be accented with a red sash and red flower in hair, or a Red dress with a Deep Purple Shawl and strappy sandals to coordinate.  Your bridesmaids will look fabulous and flirty and your groomsmen dashing. There will be no demure looking attendants with this color palette!

These intense colors of purple and red should be accented or layered with a subdued color such as burnt orange or chocolate brown to keep your wedding color palette deep and mysterious. You could also add a lighter color for contrast such as cream, taupe or pale gold. It depends on the time of day, the formality and how dramatic you want your wedding and reception to be.

The modern weddings of today are amazing and the wedding food and drinks served at them can be paired with your color scheme. Signature drinks in purple and reds would look fabulous lined up on the bar for guests to take for a most impressive look.

Every bride and groom wants to express the love and passion they feel for each other, so a dramatic purple and red wedding color scheme is just what you will need.  From the flowers to bridal party attire and the food to the favors; this dramatic color pairing will make for an unforgettable wedding.

Contributed by:
Diane Estey   – Delicate Designs – www.delicatedesigns-coord.com

Allow enough time in your timeline for your wedding gown

A commonly overlooked detail when planning a wedding is to give yourself enough time to order your dream wedding dress. If you’re looking for a customized wedding gown, you should allot at least six months for the dress to be ordered and altered. Anything less, you run the risk of not having time to do enough fittings or even getting the dress you want.

And one last piece of advice: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, consider hiring a wedding planner or at least a Day-of Coordinator to help arrange all the little details.  With their knowledge and high level of expertise in the industry they are uniquely positioned to create your memorable day at a lower cost to you, their client.  It is their goal to create a wedding that will reflect your unique personality and style, with your needs being of the utmost importance, and will be committed to meeting those needs and requests.

Contributed by:
Diane Estey – Delicate Designs – www.delicatedesigns-coord.com

When your Best Man is a Woman

You are getting married and you and your intended are deciding on the members of the wedding party.  He can’t decide which of his good friends he should ask to be the best man. No matter whom he chooses, someone’s feelings will be hurt. So, he decides to ask his sister. Or perhaps the bride has a friend since childhood that she wants to be in her line, but he happens to be a guy, not a girl. Can she have a male bridesmaid?

Today, it is fine to include a person of the opposite sex among your attendants.  Older couples with adult children have been doing this for years. The criteria for choosing attendants remains the same as it has always been – choose relatives or people who are close to you and will continue to be a part of your life in the future.  If that person is of the opposite sex, that is fine in most instances, unless your wedding will be held in a conservative church or synagogue. Then, you may need to obtain the approval of the pastor/priest/rabbi before asking the person to be in your line.

It is also appropriate to choose a young girl to fill the position of ring bearer if you have no young boys you would like to include. A female ring bearer carries the title of ring bearer but dresses much like the flower girls. During the ceremony she will stand on the groom’s side.

-Submitted by Glenna Tooman, Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC
© 2006, all rights reserved
www.memorable-events.com

Red or White or both?

Are you considering serving wine at your upcoming Idaho wedding? Is the choice of serving red or white or both stressing you out?

Consider the following items when making this wedding catering decision:

• Are you and your family/friends wine fans? Would most of your friends/family prefer to drink wine instead of champagne?

HINT: consider using wine for your toast – a nice white wine could be a great crisp note after a brilliant toast

• What time of day is your wedding? Indoors or out? Time of year?

HINT: pair your wine selection with the weather and the atmosphere just as much as with your food

• What are you serving? Snacks or sit down catered meal?

HINT: pair your wine selections with your food flavors, but narrow down your choices so you can buy in bulk and cash in on savings

• Who all will be drinking wine? Is it an open bar? Is it the only alcoholic beverage you will be serving?

HINT: just as you wouldn’t dare serving any catering or your wedding cake without sampling – be sure to sample your wine choices! Have a pre-wedding tasting party and invite key family members and friends. See which wines are the most popular and stock up for the big day!

Above all, don’t let this choice be a stresser. Your friends and family are there to see you get married, and any sauce on the side is just gravy… so to speak!

Flower Girl Responsibilities

Ring Bearer: The ring bearer is often a boy, though a girl may also serve as ring bearer.  It is acceptable to have more than one ring bearer, if desired, or none at all.  On the day of the wedding, the ring bearer will walk down the aisle after the bridesmaids and either before the flower girl or with her.  He/she will carry a pillow that has either the bride and groom’s rings attached to it, or plastic rings attached.

The child who is chosen to be the ring bearer should be old enough to understand what is happening and to cooperate with people who may be strangers without becoming frightened.  If the ceremony isn’t too long, the ring bearer may stand with the groomsmen.  If the child is young, or the ceremony is long, the child may take a seat with parents after he/she has given the rings to both the bride and the groom.  After the ceremony, the child may be more comfortable if he/she is able to change into other clothing.  Children do not stand in a receiving line.

Depending on the clothing the bride chooses for the ring bearer to wear, the ring bearer’s parents may be asked to purchase or rent the clothing.  The bride and groom should decide who will pay for the cost of the clothing before the child is asked to participate in the wedding, so there are no misunderstandings.  Generally, the parents pay the costs.

Flower Girl: Though either a girl or a boy can be a ring bearer, only a girl can be a flower girl.  It is acceptable to have more than one flower girl, if desired, or none at all.  Dress the flower girl like a child, rather than in a miniature formal.  The bride will decide what the flower girl wears and it may be necessary for the child’s parents to pay for the clothing.

During the wedding, the flower girl precedes the bride down the aisle and sprinkles flower petals for the bride to walk on (if allowed).  During the ceremony, she will stand beside the bridesmaids.  The child or children who act as flower girls should be old enough to understand what is happening and to cooperate with people who may be strangers without becoming frightened.  If the child is young, or the ceremony is long, it is acceptable for the flower girl to be seated with her parents if they are seated near the front of the room. The flower girl does not stand in a receiving line.

Candle Lighters: Older children or young adults should be chosen to act as candle lighters.  If there are numerous candles, you might choose two candle lighters.  If there are only a few candles, one candle lighter can probably handle them all.  If the candle lighters are male, they should be dressed in tuxedos or suits similar to those worn by the groomsmen.  In fact, the groomsmen or bridesmaids, or one of each, may act as candle lighters, if you prefer.  If the candle lighters are female, they should wear dresses that coordinate with those worn by the bridesmaids, but they do not need to match exactly.  Be certain the persons chosen to light the candles are tall enough to reach the top-most candles in the tallest candelabra.

The candle lighters will be the first members of the wedding party to walk down the aisle.  If there are candles on the ends of the pews, those should be lighted first, then the candles at the front of the room.  The candle lighters do not light the unity candle or side tapers unless requested to do so.  After lighting the candles, the candle lighters exit back up the aisle.  They may then be seated with their parents or the other guests.  After all members of the wedding party have left the sanctuary and the mothers of the bride and groom and grandmothers have been ushered out, the candle lighters may return to extinguish the candles if the bride chooses for them to do so. The candle lighters do not stand in a receiving line. Candle lighters or their parents may be asked to pay for their clothing for the wedding.

Ushers: The groomsmen may serve as ushers, or the groom may choose other individuals to serve.  Plan on having one usher for every 50 guests.  If people other than groomsmen serve as ushers, they should be dressed in tuxedos similar to those worn by the groomsmen, or in matching suits.  Ushers should not be dressed in casual shirts and slacks unless the wedding is casual.  Guests need to be able to identify them. The primary responsibility of the ushers is to seat the wedding guests before the ceremony.  Ushers will be given instructions at the rehearsal about where honored guests, such as mothers of the bride and groom and grandparents, are to be seated.

If the reception is being held at the same location as the ceremony, ushers may be asked to accept gifts as guests arrive.  At the end of the ceremony, after the wedding party has exited the sanctuary, two ushers will return to escort the mothers and grandmothers out and to dismiss the guests, unless the bride and groom choose to do it themselves. The ushers should be able to direct guests to the location of the reception, whether it is being held in another room in the same building or at another location.  They should also be familiar with the location of coat racks, rest rooms, nursery, and any other areas guests may need.  If the reception is being held in the same location as the ceremony, the ushers may be asked to assist in moving chairs, setting up tables, setting out centerpieces and other necessary activities to quickly prepare for the reception.

The ushers do not stand in a receiving line.  Ushers should remain in their tuxedos for a reasonable time during the reception before changing.  After changing, the tuxedos should be given to the best man or another designated individual, who will return them unless the usher paid for his own, then it is his responsibility to return it.

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When the members of the wedding party know what to do and work together, the wedding will proceed smoothly.

-© 2006 Glenna Tooman, Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC; all rights reserved

Bridesmaid Responsibilities

The Maid of Honor/Matron of Honor:  When accepting the honor of being the bride’s primary attendant, the maid/matron of honor should be prepared to pay for her dress and shoes and hair styling, unless the bride indicates otherwise.  She may also need to pay for her transportation and lodging if she is from out of town.

If the maid/matron of honor lives near the bride, she may want to take an active role in helping the bride plan the wedding, including going shopping, helping make decorations and decorating the wedding and/or reception sites.  It is also appropriate for the maid/matron of honor to host a bridal shower and be involved with the planning of a bachelorette party if she chooses to do so, but it is not required.  If the bridesmaids’ dresses are rented, the maid/matron of honor may be asked to pick them up the day before the wedding and return them after the wedding.

The maid of honor should be well acquainted with the details of the wedding plans so she can assist the wedding coordinator in handling any last-minute problems that might occur.  In order to fully understand the plans, she may want to attend at least one of the bride’s meetings with the wedding coordinator, if possible.  She should also work closely with the best man at the rehearsal and on the wedding day to be sure everything goes smoothly.

On the day of the wedding, the maid/matron of honor will be expected to do the following:

• Help the bride dress
• Precede the bride down the aisle
• Arrange the bride’s train during the ceremony, if needed
• Hold the bride’s bouquet during the ceremony
• Carry the groom’s ring, or get it from the ring-bearer’s pillow, and hand it to the bride at the appropriate time (unless the best man holds both rings)
• After the ceremony, she may stand in a receiving line, but she is not required to do so
• Communicate closely with the wedding coordinator on any necessary matter
• Sign the marriage license
• Give a toast at the reception if asked

After the wedding, the maid/matron of honor should assist in clean-up and removal of decorations.  She should collect and return any rented dresses or other items, and do anything else that the bride might request.

-© 2006 Glenna Tooman, Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC; all rights reserved

• Visit your local hardware store – check out the paint swatches and the “in” colors – new trends in home décor might be the ticket you need
• Take a stroll through furniture stores and the home décor section in your favorite department store – they’ll have the latest trends displayed in different combinations and textures
• Magazines – check out home decoration and gardening magazines for interesting color combinations and hot trends
• Wedding rentals – take a visit to your local rental location and see what hot ideas they have on display
• Craft stores – browse the aisles of your local craft store for ideas from new fabrics, scrapbooking supplies and more. They will have interesting color combinations that might fit your fancy – and you might even be inspired with additional ideas for decorations and favors… but that is another blog…